you locked yourself away in a room made of mirror
and you forgot you are claustrophobic, perfect
images of you making an infinite of you
you’ll always be the realest
crown on your head, you are no one’s queen
you sing yourself to sleep everynight
you are your own king
showers of pleasure make you dance
vapor drops roll down your back
you sexualise as you close your eyes
fantasies of living overseas with two dogs and yourself
making money sitting in an audi r8
riding solo, ask you how you doing? great
no opinion matter greater than yours
how come you look so good but never flatter yourself
you don’t ask for help
when you don’t know your roads you’ll find them
rather, you’ll make your own
buy yourself gifts cause you don’t give a fuck
tuck yourself in your own throne, you never gave a fuck
you don’t need a man to understand you
you are the only one who can stand you and that’s okay
you’ll always be okay
and in the end when all this is over
you’ll want to die alone, on your own terms
and you’ll die in your own arms
WhatsApp Image 2017-08-22 at 1.46.44 AM.jpeg
artwork by manasi hegde


it’s a relationship of two     and you know i’m gonna wait on you     doesn’t mean you keep me waiting     i’ll be patient till twenty     that’s when you said we maybe start dating     you don’t know how to name love     you don’t realize that it’s me     crying on your shoulder kissing your neck     if that ain’t love then what it mean     at times we might not end up on the same page     but we part of the same book     at times i hit you with my rage     you knock me down with a left hook

all these balloons filled with helium
can all these balloons heal me i am numb
all these balloons filled with your breath
when they deflate can i taste you in the room
all these cards hung by ribbons float away
don’t take away my happiness 
it’s new and i just found it
happy birthday, happy birthday

WhatsApp Image 2017-08-14 at 9.41.52 AM

ps it is on the 9th of august

every morning i wake up in winter
and the world is a north pole
it was never a better place even if you lived or died
vapour leaves the harshness of my lips
smoke warms my aching lungs and my heart beats for a second
icicles of tears frozen on this face
all this space i wanted but i got nowhere to go
nothing to see on this empty road
i don’t need clothes i’m used to the cold till my bone
i see no difference between immortal men and mortal men
i see no difference between not believing and saying amen
it’s all the same over here
it means nothing over here
this is no man’s land and yet so many people stumble over here

the blood you bled gave colour to my roses
the wind you breathed brought the waves of salt to my beaches
the tears you wept poured down on my earth of ashes and dirt
the dilation of your pupils brought an eclipse to my world

people hurt without knowing it

the dilation of your pupils brought darkness to my world
the tears you wept poured down on my earth and flooded it
the wind you breathed brought tsunamis that eroded my sand
the blood you bled dried and killed my roses



You saw me in all my shades of red yellow and blue
And all that I saw turned into nothing when I saw you
Black and white, you stayed in the grey
All the paints smeared when you touched me
All that I was beautiful for, turned into ugly
You were smudged everywhere, unable to add another layer
If only you weren’t so fucked up in your mind
I would have loved you better if I wasn’t so colour blind

ps - this poem is not about love