permanent damage

like all the other happy colours we never did blend in

and caring less meant no hurt

there’s no war without blood mixed with dirt

but red looks like art on a body of grey

and there’s pain even if you leave, even if you stay

maybe you were beautiful but toxic

my mind deteriorated, body turned frail

too lovesick

when I was broken into fragments of humiliation and the loss of pride

feeling unwanted and cyanide

bridges burnt and rebuilt with the feeling of guilt

our creation is temporary but the damage is permanent



You saw me in all my shades of red yellow and blue
And all that I saw turned into nothing when I saw you
Black and white, you stayed in the grey
All the paints smeared when you touched me
All that I was beautiful for, turned into ugly
You were smudged everywhere, unable to add another layer
If only you weren’t so fucked up in your mind
I would have loved you better if I wasn’t so colour blind

ps - this poem is not about love